Recently I made a huge life changing decision. I don’t mean one of those life changing decisions that are an echo of New Years resolutions. You all know those declarations you make while you’re drunk at about midnight that last about- oh maybe 2 weeks. Those so called promises you make to yourself that you will work out everyday, lose 20 pounds or even that classic hungover New Years morning pledge that you will “Never drink AGAIN”
For starters, I’ve always refused to make a New Years resolution. Well other than the obligatory morning I’ll never drink again, but even that only lasts about twenty four hours. For all the women out there- have you ever noticed how a hangover and childbirth resemble each other. Once the initial agony and pain are over your brain seems to have memory blockers that obliterate the misery and cause you to forget. How else do you explain that we think it’s a great idea to have the second or third parasite (children for those nicer than me) or that we ever pick up the next drink?
Wow- it seems I just can’t keep myself from rambling so back to my big ole life changing decision.
I was raised by a southern woman who is what I refer to as the eternal optimist. She has always seen the best in people, even when I was young and thought she had completely lost her mind on occasion. She forgives easily, even when she shouldn’t. She has a strong mind, but has always refused to argue or convince others she is right. She smiles through pain and most importantly even when many in the past have judged she typically says – yes, but there but by the grace of God go I. Her favorite saying has always been “This too shall pass”. That statement rings in my ears even before she says it to me now.
When I was younger I always believed it was because she was just naive. She must of been raised under a rock. Obviously she really did fall off the back of a turnip truck yesterday. No one could possibly be this optimistic.
As I age though I am learning it’s not any of those things. The truth of the matter is she makes a choice everyday. She chooses to see the best in people and forgive easily- even if she doesn’t forget. She chooses to believe that even if today is a struggle tomorrow will be better. You know that Scarlett O’Hara phrase “Tomorrow is another day” She truly lives it and believes. She chooses to smile through pain. She didn’t fall of the turnip truck yesterday- she choose to stay on the truck and figure out how to cook them for dinner.
So today I made a decision to do the same. I deleted myself from as many negative things in my life as possible. The laundry and teenagers I have to keep- it’s some law of nature or something, but everything else had to go.
First thing I did was take myself off my neighborhood and all my local communities social media sites. Who knew it was that easy- you just go in and hit un-join. I made the decision that living with all my community neighbors would be a lot less unpleasant for me if I didn’t know for sure that so many were, what I lovingly call, bat shit crazy. It’s easier for me if I can still believe in a world where when people have a problem or concern they will get their lazy rear end from behind their computer and instead of condemning their neighbor or call the cops due to something silly they might actually be understanding or God forbid have an actual conversation with a human.
Second thing I did was understand that I am myself bat shit crazy. I just made the decision that I no longer feel any need to convince any one else that my brand of crazy is correct or honorable. I no longer feel the need to teach a class on how to do crazy, by what I believe is, appropriately. Trust me- I’ve thought about it a lot and it falls under the category of life I’ve titled-“teaching a pig to dance”. It just frustrates you and aggravates the pig – and fyi – pigs can’t dance- pigs just role in mud til their slaughtered. I don’t like laundry enough to stay that dirty and slaughtered just sounds bad.
I’m choosing to embrace my crazy and live in my own little dream world where people are nice and honorable. Yes- I’m not stupid and know that’s not always the case, but I’m “choosing” to believe it’s possible. I’m choosing to believe that people are by nature good. I’m choosing to believe the world can come back from the condescending and judgmental world that age has taught me it can be.
Maybe that’s what the true wisdom of age really is…… it’s the freedom to choose your reality and what you choose to pass on to the next generation. I’m choosing to pass on the recipes for the turnips- thanks mom………………………………